What's the Big Deal?

I am a firm believer that Valentine’s Day can be for singles too.

Yep, you read that right. Singles. People with no “luvah’s.” People who order take out for one. People who don’t share a bank account. People who rarely have to ask someone else’s opinion on what movie to watch. People who let their dog lick their cheek cause no one else will kiss it. People who bring fellow single friends to work holiday parties. People who live in other’s basements. People who the only person they hold hands with are under 4 feet tall and also call you aunt. People who text their mother more than any other person in their contact list. People that sing love songs to their dog. People that car dance because they most often ride in their car alone. People who go to the library every Thursday to hang out in a corner by themselves. People that don't have to share the bag of popcorn. People that don't have to worry about annoying someone with the alarm going off 7 times of a morning. People that don't share a facebook account.

You see, growing up, valentine’s was never a holiday just for my parents or just a holiday for couples. It was a huge family event. Sure, my parents celebrated their couple status in various ways that day, cheesy cards, special gifts, dinners out. But usually if it was dinner out it wouldn’t actually be on Valentine’s Day. Honestly, I don’t really remember much more “celebration” that they as a couple had more than us. It wasn’t as though it was this big thing for just mom and dad to share their love for one another. It was a big day for all of us to show our love for each other. Don’t get me wrong. My parents are super expressive of their love for each other (gag). It wasn’t as though they weren’t happy to be a couple, but they made it more than just love towards the significant other and more of love towards family and friends. It was like second Christmas, but bigger. (And maybe my memory is just remembering it the way I want to, but this is honestly what I remember.)

Okay so maybe I’ve made a big deal about Valentine’s Day. Maybe I’m super weird for it being my favorite holiday. (Okay so that one isn’t a maybe, it’s a for sure thing.) Maybe my parents never anticipated that their unique celebration of a commercialized holiday would turn their youngest into a passionate fanatic. Maybe it’s been my soapbox for so long that the stepping down seems nearly impossible.

Does it sometime hurt because I don’t have “that special one” that I can share this holiday with? Honestly, yeah. It does. Sometimes more than I let on. Does it bother me that so much of that cute stuff for Valentine’s Day is aimed at people with a “luvah?” You bet it does. Does it sink my heart when so many of the special deals you find around this time are only for two people? Like a rock. Do I feel a prick when all the couples decide that because of the holiday, it's okay to have PDA around me? Maybe more than a prick.

But you see, I am a firm believer that Valentine’s Day can be for singles too.

I refuse to let them win. I refuse to wear black. I refuse to be talked off this soap box.

So personality quizzes have been going around rampant lately. One quiz said that while my character type loves deeply, we don't often talk of it. But we think our actions and gifts speak louder than actually saying the words. So maybe that's why I love this holiday so much. I get to give gifts to people I love and I don't have to go all emotional on them. Maybe it gives me an excuse to go all out for those people I love. Maybe it feels like it means more because it's not your normal holiday to give gifts and celebrate family and friends. Especially this year, I'm feel more emotional myself so it's rubbing off on this holiday. I feel like Oprah. "Aw, I love you, so here! You get a new car! And you! I'll pay your entire mortgage!! Here's a college fund for all 7 of your children!!!"
The same quiz also said that I was deeply rooted in tradition. So maybe it's also a traditional thing for me and I can't give it up because, well it's tradition.
I also hate to be defined by being single. I'd rather be defined by being a "nanny" than being a "single nanny." Maybe it's all the preconceived notions and stereo-types that come along with the title "single" that I hate, but whatever the case, I never want to introduce myself as, "Hey, I'm Tiffany and I'm single." [Rabbit trail: Don't get me wrong, singleness is a part of who I am and it does change my viewpoint. I just don't like that it defines me. Like my character, my like and dislikes, my passions, my interests have nothing to do with it because you already know all about me because I'm single. I am more than a title.] And I loath how the valentine holiday brings out the worst in "singles" and I refuse to fall into that camp for even a second.

Maybe that's why it's a big deal to me.

Listen, I get it. I’m super weird in my affinity for this holiday. I don’t even think my family understands my obsession. I don’t even think even I understand my obsession. Maybe I’m clinging desperately to an idea that needs to be let go. But honestly, it makes me feel like a kid at Christmas. Can I keep that feeling? Just for one more year? Can I keep it forever? Do I have to grow out of it?

If you are out there and single, I think I’ve firmly stated that I’m here for you. I’ll share my favorite holiday with you, in all it’s weirdness.You can hang with my equally weird family and not worry about being "single." I’ll buy you the token box of chocolates and eat them with you while watching a chick flick. I’ll hug you when it gets too much and you need to cry. I’ll share my compassionate puppy who gives great sympathy hugs too.
If you are out there and not single, but hate this holiday, I’m here for you too. I’ll help you plan that fun and romantic time. I’ll watch your kids. I’ll be your chauffer. I’ll even offer any little cooking skills I have if needed.

Just, please, don’t try and tell me how weird I am. Don't tell me the tooth fairy and leprechauns aren't real. Don’t mock my tradition of wearing valentine colors for a week before the day. Don’t bash my holiday. Don’t disillusion me and pull me off my soap box.

So I’m weird. I’m obsessive. I’m passionate. I’m clingy to a desperate degree.
This is my soap box and I’m staying up here.

Love,

Ti-Ti